Cutting off your Ears, Despite your Face-- Hospital Version

D's been at Primary Children's Medical Center since the end of December. A few nights ago, he witnessed an unfortunate event-- with a lesson we can all probably learn from it.

On the night in question, a mother brought her 6 year-old son to Intermountain Medical Center (dubbed 'The Death Star' by residents (not because of the death rate, but because of its size, no worries)) for abdominal pain around 7:00 P.M. Results from his scans and physical exam confirmed a pretty certain diagnosis: he had appendicitis and needed surgery to remove the offending infection. The people at Intermountain Medical Center told her that she would need to take her son to Primary's--they didn't do pediatric cases there. So she loaded her son and had to make the 20 minute drive up to the children's hospital. She probably saved herself hundreds of dollars by transferring him herself--an ambulance ride costs a lot of $$$$.

After her arrival in the E.R. at Primary's (D is guessing around 10:00 or 11:00 P.M., she waited. . . . .and waited. . . . .and waited. (Late evenings in the E.R during the winter--especially on weekends-- are not known for being quiet at the children's hospital. Doesn't YOUR child's symptoms always seem to get worse around 8:00 P.M. at night?) After a while (she claims 3 hours), this mom got really frustrated and angrily sought out the charge nurse. She explained that she had already waited in an E.R. once that night (down at Intermountain), and she was sure that they had told her that her son had appendicitis. Despite this mom's pleas, the charge nurse let her know that things were very busy and they would have to wait. I guess this was the last straw for this mom. She blew up at the nurse. She demanded to see a doctor. The nurse probably didn't take that well, and from what D can surminse, an argument between know-it-all charge nurse and tired mom ensued. The mom got so frustrated, SHE LEFT THE HOSPITAL and went BACK to Intermountain. She later told D that if the nurses were going to treat her so badly, she figured the doctors at this institution would not be any better.

When the woman and her sick son got to back to Intermountain, they explained that they had sent her to Primary's because they didn't have Pediatric Surgeons there. They could not treat her child. That is why they suggested she take him to the children's hospital. So angry mom goes back to Primary's and is promptly put back at the END of the line in the E.R (at this point you have to wonder if a simple call by the Emergency physician who treated her son at Primary's to the children's hospital might have helped this woman).

By the time D finally consulted on the 6-year-old, it was 3:00 A.M. The mother told him her side of the story. What could D do? He could tell she was frustrated, but she had kindof cooked her own goose. He said the only thing he's learned that can possibly help, "I'm sorry, that sounds very frustrating. I think I would feel the same way if I were in your shoes." (might I add here D has told me he learned this line in dealing with me. . . . see, I knew my temper tantrums and emotional outbursts were doing some good.)

Was this child (and his loud mother) mistreated? It is standard procedure in the E.R. to take the patients by arrival time, depending, of course, on how severe their symptoms are . . . . I guess this kid wasn't exhibiting terrible pain when he was examined by the triage nurse. Still, D feels given the fact that he already had a diagnosis they could have squeezed him in sooner. In the end, D didn't start this boy's appendectomy until 4:00 A.M (trust me, he wishes that he could have seen the patient closer to his arrival time as well).

I have been rudely spoken to by a nurse before (unfortunately, I think many of us have--if not the nurse, the doctor). . . I understand how it feels to be a patient who is just "one more" in the system. Even so, it's a given fact that if the E.R. is busy, other people are sick-- just like you. This woman's reaction did not help her (or her poor son) at all. Leaving the hospital in the middle of the night because of anger when your child NEEDS an operation? Now that seems a little crazy. The truth of the matter is that it is RSV season and the hospital is super-duper busy--people have to wait, sometimes for hours.

I wonder how often I have taken offense to someone or a situation where I made my own situation worse? I am going to try to remember this story during those crappy moments so I can just try to keep my cool. How often do I take offense and nurse my own wounds without trying to see the big picture????